Since 2001, the beginning of this century, our world has been different.  There has been steady financial crisis, as well as increasing moral decay.  While we have been bombarded with messages about keeping people safe and not bullying, our schools and neighborhoods and become less safe and full of bullies.  There are bullies everywhere trying to steal our happiness and pressure us to follow their moral standards instead of what we know is right. This social pressuring surrounds us in media, government and organizations.  

 

There is more to spiritually filter than ever before because the lines between good and bad, true and false, and right and wrong are more blurry than ever.  Social norm has replaced integrity, and economic success has replaced joy.  Popularity and political correctness has replaced relationship, and senses have replaced the Spirit.

 

 Due to these drastic changes in our culture it is time to plan for marriages of this century! The marriage relationship is the most important relationship we have, besides our relationship with God.  It is the key to our eternal happiness and it is under attack!

 

 Satan has waged a war on marriage.  He distracts us from each other, he increases our anxiety and fills our lives with fears and stresses which draw us away from our spouses.  He fills our hearts with selfishness tempting us to be two tongued and two faced with our spouses.

 

 Let us not be fooled!

 

 Our deepest, most satisfying relationship is our marriage relationship.  We need to care for it, nurture it, serve it, protect it.

 

 The Foundation 

 

 The couple relationship is a large part of the family foundation.  If the couple relationship is not in the right place everything else falls apart.  And, usually if you put effort into the couple relationship the relationship improves, and everything else gets better too.

 

 When there are problems with a child’s behaviors the parents need to have unity.  If the parents feel love and respect for each other then the children will be inspired to love and respect their parents and each other more as well.

 

 I spend my spare time teaching parents and children the principles of self-government.  The first lesson of self-government is learning how to govern yourself by being calm and deliberate.  The second lesson of self-government is how to govern yourself in a relationship, such as a marriage.  Only after a person has begun governing themselves and their behaviors in relationships can they teach another person, like a child, to govern his behaviors too.

 

 Self-government is the key to  happiness and one of our purposes of life.  One of the reasons we are here is to learn to control our physical appetites and to properly use our agency to follow Christ.  The success of both of these purposes of life require self-control and self-mastery.  Men are happy when they are the rulers of their thoughts and actions.  But, history teaches us that if men let their appetites run free they are always miserably in bondage.

 

 The Greatest Good

 

 We need to maintain our couple relationships or in no time all the relationships in the family will start to fall apart.  There are so many good things that we can spend our time on; work, children, projects, hobbies, television, studies, friends, etc.  However, none of these pursuits can replace the benefits gained by choosing the greatest good; the couple relationship.

 

 These difficult times demand security and stability.  If there was ever time when we needed strong marriages the time is now!  When we focus on our marriage relationship, we are essentially focusing on eternity.  We are looking past the moment to the blessings of forever.  And, when we live eternally with our spouses now, the eternal tone in our home will be contagious.  The children will see eternity too.  The whole family will have hope.

 

 I see no greater way to protect our families from the pains of our days than by strengthening the couple relationship each day.  If husband and wife are untied, then our homes, offices, and communities will be united too.

 

 As I look ahead, it seems to me that marriage will make and break our century.  Those who invest in their marriage relationships will add stability and self-government to our world.  And, those who advocate not honoring the traditional marriage relationship will tear our society apart from it’s very core.  The family.  

by, Nicholeen Peck

 

Come To Nicholeen’s 2013 Teaching Self-Government Couples’ Retreat