We’ve been much too somber around here lately. So, it’s time for a bit of fun: I have translated M* into Redneck. Be sure to choose the dialect you want (Redneck is the funniest, imho), then hit “dialectize” and then read my post on immigration, with the comments from lotsa rednecks.
All this stuff is courtesy a web site called The Dialectizer, which did the translating. The site basically takes key words in the text and translates them into different dialects: jive, Elmer Fudd, Swedish Chef, Hacker, etc.
For those of you with a sense of humor deficit, here’s an explanation of why the Dialectizer is not racist.
Hmmm… Clark still sounds smart in “Redneck”
I kahnt wayt ter attend “Juneral Conference”
Fry mah hide! ah reckon Clark sounds ’bout half smart. He be the Ulysses Everett McGill o’ this here outfit, as enny fool kin plainly see.
Also, I translated the “Mormon Face” post into redneck and here’s part of Adam Greenwood’s comment, which made me laugh thinking about his voice (podcast with Steve) with these words:
Kimball, thet cornfoun’ed scoun’rel! Fry mah hide! I’ll larn him his place, suh. I’ll houn’dogwhip him, suh. Now off t’read th’ Book of Common Prayer.
~ Adam Greenwood | 09/13/05 16:29
This hyar site is hilarious; ah put in CNN.com an’ c’dn’t quit laughin’. Th’ noos is much better this hyar way.
Thanks fo’ this hyar ketch.
I love this:
“ah reckon it’s unfo’tunate thet we offen embrace hardness as a kind of default posishun. Ennythin’ fine muss be hard, ennythin’ easy muss be bad, cuss it all t’ tarnation. But one kin jest as easily say thet wif menny thin’s, eff’n it’s hard then yer not doin’ it right. “
Though I also love how my blog in a cockney accent reads:
“I luv the chuffin’ Old Testament
And also the Pearl of Great Price. Straight up, I’m bloody well diggin’ teachin’ the bloody actual scriptures so much, it’s not even funny…
[…]
Unfortunately, now I’m bloody well reeeeeally wishin’ there were a Sharin’ Time bullet for sumfink along the lines of “Heavenly Favver and Jesus Christ Promised Us Us Agency” — because this jail theme is straight up groovy. I can spot it now, dressin’ up ‘alf the bleedin’ class in stripes and ‘andcuffs. ^___^”
There’s something about the bizarre combination of Mormonisms and Valley speak, plus the cockney…
(the Jive translation of http://www.lds.org is amusing, too… at least the parts about the “BYU Honky Chicks’s Conference.”)
An’ it came t’pass thet I, Nephowdy-doo, said unto mah Pappy: ah will hoof it an’ does th’ thin’s which th’ Lo’d hath comman’ed, fo’ ah knows thet th’ Lo’d giveth no comman’ments unto th’ chillun of men, save he shall prepare a way fo’ them thet they may accomplish th’ thin’ which he comman’eth them, dawgone it.
Weneva da news change, dis page get sometin new from da Hawaii pidgin bible. Fo check um out make click hea, brah! http://www.pidginbible.org/index.html
So here’s a question: what makes it OK to make fun of poor white people when it wouldn’t be OK to do the same think in other dialects? I mean, it’s hard to imagine seeing an article talking about how funny it is to read M* in Ebonics or Engrish.
Yes, we officially have our first comment from somebody who needs to rent a sense of humor (#8). If you are concerned about racial issues, I urge you to read the link above on why there is a difference between racism and observing peoples’ dialects. If you are all fired-up offended about my use of Redneck, you can choose to read another dialect, like “Elmer Fudd” or “Swedish chef” or even “jive,” which appears to me very similar to “Ebonics.” My advice to the humor challenged: “be vewwwy, vewwwy quiet.”
Sorry Geoff B. I have to stand in solidarity with Paul Robichaux on this one. I don’t think this is racist as much as it is regionalist. In American society it is still okay to make fun of Mormons and Southerners. I have lived in the south for over 20 years. I was raised in Utah and married a guy from southern Idaho. I “know†what a redneck is.
My family for years has had a brand of humor we call ‘doing Jane Austen/ Darth Vader in a Robert E. Lee voice.” “Lu-uke, Ah ahm yo fahthuh.” Guess we weren’t as original as I thought.
@9: hey, Geoff, thanks for the warm welcome! I hope you’re as pleasant to all first-time commenters.
As it happens, I *do* have a sense of humor, but I guess we differ on what’s funny. See, I grew up in the South. I know many fine people– and not a few of them faithful church members– who look and sound like typical American rednecks. Heck, by the typical Wasatch Front definition, I probably *am* a redneck. I’m not claiming that the Dialectizer itself is racist, but I think even a casual reading of Alma 32 might help you understand why I think this *use* of it is objectionable.
Should the casual reading be “normal” or do we have to convert it to redneck first?
Paul, I hope you will come back and post at M* again. My post #9 was meant to be funny (hence the Elmer Fudd voice), but I will admit that sometimes humor doesn’t come through in writing the same way it does in person. We may just have different senses of humor or it’s possible that I’m just not funny at all.
Making fun of people’s accents happens worldwide. People from Rio de Janeiro make fun of Sao Paulo accents, people from Bavaria make fun of Berlin accents and people from Madrid make fun of Basque accents. I don’t know Asia well but I bet people from Tokyo make fun of Nagasaki accents and on and on. It’s just part of the standard use of humor worldwide. People can either be offended by it or they can calm down and realize it’s just that, humor.
Although I don’t have a redneck accent, I spend a lot of time around southern redneck types down here in Miami (by their own admission), and I feel more comfortable with them than with a lot of other people. I listen to country stations, go to square dances, go shooting at the shooting range with them. And these people seem to have a sense of humor about regional accents. One person I know said: “I didn’t know I was a Redneck until I left Tallahassee and came to Miami. But now I’m proud of it.”
So, if you’re offended, well, there’s not much I can do about that. But if it makes you feel better, I grew up in beach community in California and sometimes I can fall back into a surfer-dude accent that people make fun of. It’s a ridiculous accent, and you can make fun of it all you want if you’d like. Riii-chous, Dude!!!
Nate: #6 – Hee hee! That really made me smile. The clincher is that dawgone it, at the end, there. Sort of a come hell or highwater kind of thing, dagnabbit!
Much needed chuckles here, thanks guys!