By Tanya Spackman
The last couple of weeks I was on a business trip in a different state. I had to work one of the Sundays I was there, so missed church. Surprisingly, I even drove by the local LDS church each day on my way to work. I’m lucky in that I rarely miss church due to work; in the 5 years I’ve had this job, this is only the second time I’ve had to work on Sunday. I occassionally miss church due to illness or travel (non-work related), but I’m almost always attending some ward on any given Sunday.
And I missed church. Not missed as in did not attend (though it was that, too), but missed as in I felt something missing in my life.
I’m one of those people who finds church fairly dull. Generally I go out of habit and because I’m supposed to be there; I have a testimony of the gospel and know that is where the Lord wants me to be on Sundays. My spiritual education and enlightenment comes from personal study, not church, with occassional exceptions. I sometimes enjoy the Spirit at church, but sometimes it is just the thing to do and the place to be Sunday from 10 to 1 (or whatever the time is if I’m visiting another ward).
Also, I’m not a particularly social person; it’s nice to say hello to people and chat with them when I don’t see them at any other time, but I’d be fine if our paths crossed less often (not because I don’t like them, just because I’m not much for the social pleasantries). And I’m okay with all of that. None of that is a complaint.
But when I don’t go, whether due to travel or illness, I definitely feel that I missed something. My day and week and life just isn’t complete. Maybe it is because I miss out on the sacrament. Maybe it is because I am so conditioned to have that be a part of my week. Maybe, despite not really being into the social thing, I miss that bit of interaction with a larger community. Maybe the Spirit at church makes more of a difference than I give it credit.
When I was back home and attended church last Sunday, it was a comforting experience. It really is where I’m meant to be.
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Tanya Spackman is single and lives in Dugway, Utah. She served a mission in Chicago, and graduated from BYU in 1998 with a degree in molecular biology. She currently works for a contractor as a technical writer and editor at Dugway Proving Ground.
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