I know that after most LDS funerals in North America (I know nothing of LDS funeral traditions elsewhere), the extended family meets after either the funeral service or graveside dedication in the cultural hall for a post-funeral meal (mmmm… funeral potatoes are the best). It’s a nice tradition. A great tradition was something I experienced on my mission.
On my mission I attended several funerals, but the first one was in a branch in Indiana (which turned into a ward before I even came home from my mission). Our branch mission leader died in a sudden, unexpected accident while on vacation. It was a shock to the tight branch. My companion and I, of course, went to his funeral. He was a high school teacher, and many current and former students and fellow teachers came to his funeral. I hope to have as good a turnout when I die.
After the funeral, this branch had the tradition of everyone who attended the funeral service staying after for a meal. And this wasn’t a burden placed on just the Relief Society president or compassionate service leader; it was a potluck meal (and it was a good potluck meal) where, if not every family, certainly many families contributed. There was more than enough food for everyone, and it seemed like the branch and community greatly enjoyed being together, offering support to the family, and sharing memories with each other.
This is a tradition that I think should spread. Surely other ward traditions have been successful and could be shared. What great traditions does your ward have?
This does sound nice for a funeral of a very popular person. But for many other funerals, it might not work out as well. People often can’t spend 4 or 5 hours attending a funeral plus graveside and reception.
One of the reasons for feeding the family after a funeral is because some of them have traveled to attend, and the family is dealing with the death, and it is helpful to not have to worry about feeding people.
My favorite tradition was stake and ward track meets. They were a lot of fun. My dad helped organize several of them, and he had ribbons for the place winners in each age group.
This is related to what you are talking about, but is a bit of a threadjack.
I attended one funeral while on my mission in Taiwan. The man was the only member in his family, so it was a Buddhist funeral with a Christian veneer. For example instead of having Chanting Monks, they had a tape of the MoTab going on.
Well, we take the man to the creamatorium. During this part of a regular Buddhist funeral the casket would be hosted onto the ramp or coveyerbelt of the oven and then put into the fire, all accompanied by monks chanting sutras. Well we missionareis took the casket over and as soon as the Conveyer belt started up “The Spirit of God Like a Fire is Burining” came on. How appropiate.
Funerals around here seem to be mini multi-stake reunions, especially if a long time member passes, someone who has been around before the first stake in Indianapolis split.
Funerals also seem to turn into meet-and-greets. A son-in-law (he was 40-something) of one of my older buddies in the ward passed away. Out of respect for my older friend, I went to the viewing and hung around with him. His friends then introduced me around.
The deceased and his widow, who lived in the neighboring stake, had many non-member friends. You could also tell who were the members and who weren’t by the somberness. Non-members were somber, but there was a noticeable “upbeat-ness” among the members.
I never thought of this as a tradition, until coming to Utah and never seeing anything like it. Perhaps it isn’t as rare as it seems, but I’ve never seen it elsewhere.
I found this SO valuable to me. Every month in our ward in New York along the Hudson River, there would be a Fireside. Every other month, though, the Fireside was just for the youth, and it was by the bishop, and it was called a Bishop’s Discussion.
Since I was almost constantly the President of whichever level of Young Women’s I was in, I had alot of opportunity to work with the bishop on considering and selecting the topics for these bishop’s discussion firesides.
They were held in one of the larger classrooms, not in the chapel. It was a more intimate and personal setting; I feel that it really had an impact on the rest of the youth; I know it did on me.
These were my FAVORITE church “lessons”, because they were so topical about what was concerning the youth in the ward at the time, and also the bishop gave us much counsel on many of the things that tend to trip teens up as they struggle with growing, learning, and experiencing life.
Our ward has a Fourth of July breakfast. We gather at a local park. The Elder’s Quorum cooks the meal. Then we retire to the nearby public pool until noon. Great fun. No pressure.
On the flip side, our ward used to have a pot luck dinner every Fast Sunday. The smell of food cooking would drive the kids crazy. The deacons would break into the kitchen and raid the food. The kids would fight to get in line first and the parents would visit rather than control their precious little progeny. Adults who forgot to bring something would pop over to KFC or the deli to pick something up. When I became bishop’s councilor, the bishop asked what we thought of the pot luck. I asked if he felt it added to the spirit of the fast and the spirit of the Sabbath. He discontinued it. Every time we get a new bishop, reinstating the practice is brought up in Ward Council. Our most recent bishop is new enough to the ward that he never experienced the practice. His reply was, *You’ve got to be kidding.*
Once a year the members of the ward gather in the town square for a lottery. We all draw slips of paper, first by family, and then by individual. And then we all stone the lottery winner to death. It helps with the corn harvest and whatnot.
Nate, you made me chuckle. I suspect funerals are the most interesting meetings we have.
We used to have an evening picnic up at Wood’s Ranch outside of Cedar City, on the mountain on the 24th of July.
We’d all take our kids to the parade and stuff, then truck up the mountain for a get-together. The ward would do the meat and we’d pitch in with different salads and desserts. It was so fun.
The bishop who initiated that tradition died and it stopped.
gst- lol
gst, I thought my ward was the only one that did that.
(By the way, I never read that story in school, and when some friends were horrified at my poor education – I felt so illiterate – I had to track down the story and read it to complete my eduction.)
gst, I totally skipped your post. I think we should do that and I will do the picking and I know just the person I want to stone.
Anne, sorry, you don’t get to decide who to stone. It’s a lottery. Your suggestion is barbaric.
Our ward has a potluck supper between sessions of Sunday General Conference at the ward building (which is where those of us still go to watch it who don’t have KBYU on satellite or DirectTV), and it is a feast!