My ward has a new Girls’ Camp director, and she sat in Young Womens today so she can get to know the girls before camp (which I think is sometime in June). Our first camp meeting will be this Wednesday. Thus, I’ve been thinking about my experiences at Girls’ Camp, especially my first year.
I almost didn’t go. My birthday is in July, and the stake we lived in had Girls’ Camp in August, so I would turn 12 just a few weeks before camp and be eligible to go. The ward started preparing for camp several months early, so they contacted me to get me involved so I could go with them. Thanks, but no thanks, I told them. I wanted nothing to do with camp. They were kind of confused by this – most girls look forward to it. But I was adamant that I didn’t want to go.
I didn’t explain it to the YW leaders, and I didn’t even explain it to my mom, so no one could resolve my concerns. However, the previous summer had been 5th Grade Summer Camp, and it was hell. Even though 5th Grade Camp was a school camp and Girls’ Camp was a church camp, they both involved going up in the mountains as a group for a week, and I wanted nothing to do with it. Count me out. Forget it.
Fifth Grade Camp came the summer between 5th and 6th grade. The school district broke the elementary schools up into three groups, and then for your group’s week, you went up to the camp. I wish I could remember where it was, because as hellish as it was, it was in a really beautiful area. Our week came, and I was excited because they’d advertised this well to get as much participation as possible. There were very few people who didn’t go. It started out with a hike into the camp. I don’t know how long the hike was – no more than 3 miles probably – but it was unexpected (no one told us it would start this way), and there was no water until we got to camp. Great. Hiking (an activity I hated) in the mountains in July with no water. When we finally got to camp, I downed a ton of ice cold mountain water. It was delicious. And I got sick because I’d been so thirsty and drank too much water too fast.
They then gathered the girls all together (the boys were gathered somewhere else) so that we could be divided into our tents. They had three large army tents with wooden raised platforms for us to sleep in. They told us to get in groups of two or three, so that we could be with friends, and then they’d split us up into the tents. At this time in my life, there were seven of us who usually hung out together: Patricia, Tanya (another Tanya, not me), Tammy, Mary Ellen, Mary Beth, VeLeah, and me. We were all standing together, and three of them grouped together, and they raised their hands.
“Can there be four in our group?”
“Sure, that’s fine,” said one of the teachers (it was 5th grade teachers from the various elementary schools who mostly ran the camp).
With four in the group, they raised their hands again, “Can there be five in our group?”
“Fine,” said the teacher, who seemed to be getting impatient, trying to keep all these 11-year-olds under control. A fifth person was pulled into their group.
Obviously the next question was, “Can there be six in our group?” Again the answer was yes, and the girls pulled the sixth person in. I was the only one not pulled into the group. They didn’t ask if there could be seven in a group, and they just looked at me and shrugged. They may as well have literally stabbed me in the heart, it hurt so much. I had thought I was one of them, but I was clearly mistaken. I moved a bit away and just stood there alone. The teachers started dividing the groups of friends into the tents. The teacher who was dividing up our area happened to be one of the teachers from my school, so she knew me. When she asked who I was with and I told her no one, she knew who I usually hung out with (those six girls who’d just rejected me) and put me with them. They acted like they were so happy I got to be with them after all, which confused me. When we got our stuff and went to our tent to arrange where we would all sleep, I was put at the end of the row, as none of them really wanted to be with me.
So that’s how 5th Grade Camp started, and it remained pretty much the same for the whole week. There was a lot of hiking (like I said, I hate hiking), and some of the teachers were really nasty and didn’t seem to want to be there (there were also some teachers who were cool). It was miserable and stressful. I made it to the end and vowed to never go to another camp ever again. I liked camping with my family, but camp and camping are two totally different things.
So fast forward to the next summer when Girls’ Camp came up. As I mentioned, I wanted nothing to do with it. There were 18 YW in my ward, and all of them were going but me, and the YW leaders really, really wanted everyone to go. My parents had a very hands-off approach to parenting, and they said it was totally up to me; they weren’t going to tell the YW leaders to leave me alone, but they also weren’t going to insist I go. The leaders kept bugging me (I don’t want to give the impression they were obnoxious about it because they really weren’t; they just kept trying to figure out why I didn’t want to go, and I kept not telling them, so they just kept trying to sell it in a kind but general way), and I finally caved. I enjoyed the pre-camp stuff, like a car wash fundraiser to earn money to pay for camp. I was really scared about what lay ahead, but I was also kind of looking forward to it.
The morning of departure arrived. The whole stake met at the stake center at some ungodly, early morning hour like 6 a.m. As I sat in the car with my mom in the dark, pre-dawn summer air, and other people came and started loitering around the buses that would take us up to camp, I started to cry. I was so anxious. Fifth Grade Camp started with buses, too. My mom tried to tell me I would probably have a lot of fun, but I was just scared that it would be rejection and misery all over again. I spotted some people from my ward, and they seemed to be gathering, so I bid my mom farewell and grabbed my stuff and joined them. We drove to the camp (it was probably an hour drive or so, maybe a bit longer because the busses couldn’t go uphill very fast), and we set up our tents and everything got underway.
Thank goodness those leaders wouldn’t leave me alone. I had a blast. It was so much fun, and I went every summer after. I loved the spiritual part with the devotionals and testimony meeting. I loved passing off the camp skills. There was some hiking, but it actually wasn’t so bad without a nasty teacher berating me for being slow; the other girls and the leaders were kind and some went slowly so I wouldn’t have to hike alone. I loved the crafts. I loved hanging out with the other girls and the adult leaders who were so fun and so silly and so cool.
So with pre-camp stuff starting in my ward, I hope the girls that I teach have a fun time and feel loved when they go to camp.
My wife, the great LF, went to Brighton ski resort for Girl’s Camp one year. She remembers being shunned because she wouldn’t do the rappelling tower (she is afraid of heights).
Our ward this year is basically staying in a lodge and doing activities, but the lodge is doing all the cooking, etc. Doesn’t seem very outdoorsy…
Girls’ Camp was hands-down my favorite church activity. I was so disappointed that it was only once a year! I loved it so much that I got my parents and doctor to give me permission to go up in the last half of the week of my fourth year. I’d just recovered from mono so they said I couldn’t go on the fourth-year hike but they figured that I couldn’t wear myself out too much doing the other activities. Since I had to repeat the fourth year the next year it was even a bonus because I got one more year of camp!
Since Queuno mentioned cooking: My first year we had to make our food. I don’t remember if it was just dinner or all the meals but I do remember that cooking over a fire was… interesting. Did anyone else do those paper-bag breakfasts? You take a paper bag, line the bottom with bacon, crack some eggs into it, poke a stick through it and hold it over a fire? *lol* I suppose it works well enough but when you’ve got 22 girls trying to cook around the same fire… well…
My next year we were at a different camp site and the leaders had decided on a mess hall approach. Easier in a lot of ways but I always thought that if we were so into emergency preparedness, why weren’t we learning more about emergency skills, like starting fires w/o matches and cooking w/o kitchens?
You know, I really should figure out who’s in charge of Girls Camp in my stake and offer to be a leader. That, or help fill out someone’s camper roster… 😉
quenuno, my ward did rapelling one year. I was very anxious about it, and really didn’t want to do it (I had my reasons, but it wasn’t about heights), but was feeling all this pressure from friends and leaders to just give it a shot. We were at Beaver High Adventure Camp (a Boy Scout camp) that year, and we were weaving our way through this course of various activities this particular day. I was in a bad mood that day and not at all into doing the activities, so I only did a couple things while spending most of the time moping (as 15-year-olds are so good at doing). The upcoming rapelling was really stressing me out. I didn’t know if I would be doing it or not and I was sick of everyone talking about it. However, I never got to find out if I would do it because I decided to actually participate and do this one thing where you cross a rope between two ledges, but I fell and was knocked out and spent the rest of camp in the hospital. I’ve still never been rapelling. I don’t feel like I’m missing anything, though 🙂
As for staying in a lodge and having the lodge doing the cooking, part of me is saying, “Pffft, that’s not real girls’ camp,” and part of me is saying, “No fair! Our ward needs to do that!”
harpingheather, definitely volunteer! I’m sure the leaders would be thrilled to have an excited adult participating. I know my ward was hard up for leaders during camp last year because two of the YW presidency were having problems with their pregnancies and camping was out of the question, and too many of the rest of us couldn’t get work off (grumble, grumble). If you know who the YW president is, ask her if you can help.
One year we got lost at girls camp. I don’t mean, hey-we-can’t-see-the-tents-anymore kind of lost, I mean wandering through the woods for hours until a search party found us at dusk. I was a YCL and it was the 2nd year hike. A 2-mile-stop-every-500-yards-to-rest kind of hike. The Sister leading the hike is a career woodsperson. She has the mountain areas that we were in nearly memorized. How on earth did we get lost? Bad self-esteem got us lost.
Some snot-headed girls started complaining about being tired, and insisted that since *they* didn’t know where we were, no-one knew where we were. The priesthood leaders with us decided that these snot-heads were probably right and had a “leaders meeting” with the sister (the YCL’s weren’t invited). She didn’t have enough self-esteem to insist that she knew exactly where we were, and exactly how to get back to camp provided we remained on the trail.
So, what happened? We left the freaking trail. I was so mad. The most irritating thing is they didn’t do *anything* that you’re told to do when lost. We left the trail, even though we could have stayed on it. We wandered around for hours when you’re supposed to stay put. We even split up with one of the leaders going off by themselves. Over the course of the roughly 7 hours we spent in those woods I lost all the respect that I had for those priesthood leaders. It was only when the girl with diabetes mentioned that she didn’t feel good did we stop.
The moral of the story, don’t ever let anyone tell you that you are wrong when you know you are right.
I’m a convert and never participated in the YW’s program. My daughter turned 12 the week of girl’s camp. She didn’t want to go, but everyone in YW’s (it was a very small ward–about 8 girls total) convinced her it was the Best Thing Ever. And it was. They made it extra special for her because it was her birthday. She loved it.
I hated 5th grade outdoor ed camp with a passion. I can’t believe I even went to Girls’ Camp, but I did and loved it. I still love it. I loved because even in spite of finding out girls from church can be seriously mean, and nasty, and snotty and cliquish, somehow, the spirit there is strong enough to strenthen many young testimonies and act as a rock you can always go back and visit when times are tough.
The best part is being able to say, I slept for a week with no tent, cooked my own food on a campfire, started a bonfire with one match, and realized I could be a non-wimp when push came to shove!
Tanya, out here in the mission field of Miami, we only give a half-dozen girls to go to girls camp each summer. Camping in Florida is nothing like camping in the West — it is so hot you can’t sleep and the mosquitoes and other bugs are biting like you wouldn’t believe. (Keep in mind that people who regularly visit Florida to go camping in the summer bring A/C for their TENTS). Everybody comes back with red ankles and legs from the bites. If you go boating, you have to watch for the alligators in the water, and don’t even mention the roaches, snakes and other critters.
But all of the girls still seem to have a great time and love it and keep on going back for more. There must be something special that happens there.
My daughter does not really like YWs for the most part, but she loves Girls Camp — thank goodness for that!
As a parent in this regard, I see the benefit of the program, but I take a hands-off approach with my first daughter because of her nature, but with my next one that has 1 year left until she goes, I will not have a problem clamping down and saying she should go again because of her nature.
Girls Camp – the only redeeming value of the YW program (in my experience).
Geoff, I must remember to never go camping in Florida.
I’m glad that so many people find/found Girls’ Camp to be a good experience. I hope it is a program that never goes away.
I had a similar experience going to a 4H camp one time. I didn’t want to go at all, but my friend begged me to go. After a while I gave in. We had to bunk with two other guys. The second we walked into that room, my friend that begged me to go, turned on me. I was picked on for a week straight. It was the most miserable week of my life.
A couple of days after I got back from that camp, I left for scout camp. I wish I could say that it was a great experience, but scout camp ended up being nearly as bad as 4H camp.
I try to block that part of my childhood as much as possible.
My wife goes to girls camp every year (she is an adult convert so didn’t go as a girl). One year she was in charge of the whole shootin’ match, but usually she goes to cook (our stake has the mess hall approach). Her buds from the stake also go, and they have a total blast. So it is actually a fun thing for the leaders to participate in as well.
I lived with my non-member/anti-Church dad for every summer starting the year after I turned 12 (my birthday’s in October.) I went to Unitarian Universalist camp instead, until I got old enough that the teenage behavior tolerated at that camp freaked him out enough that I didn’t have to go (technically, I wasn’t allowed, but I also didn’t want to go.) Needless to say, he still didn’t let me go to Girl’s Camp.
I’m thinking seriously of asking to volunteer for our camp this year, even though I’m in Primary. My little sister’s a Laurel but she refuses to go, so there won’t be any creepy sister/authority junk going on.
I loved girls’ camp. For me, it was far and away the best part of YW. I spent my childhood fantasizing in highly romanticized technicolor about the camping I read about in books. My family didn’t camp, so girls’ camp was a very big deal to me.
But I’ve definitely seen camp go sour. All of those teenagers living on top of each other in the wilderness for a week can lead to infighting, nastiness, and exclusion, and friendships can turn bad in a heartbeat. So I don’t blame people who have bad memories. I think a good camp requires a lot of leaders–a lot of careful planning, and a lot of close supervision to stay one step ahead of whatever the kids may be doing to themselves and to each other.
Sarah, definitely volunteer. If your ward is anything like mine, they will be more than happy to have more adults there.
Eve, I totally agree that there needs to be lots of leaders and planning and supervision.
I loved my experiences at LDS girls’ camp. I recently went back and re-read my journal from 1986, and found that I had written twenty-six pages about all of the adventures my friends and I had at girls’ camp!!! Twenty-six college-ruled spiral notebook pages!!!
I loved hiking and canoeing, singing around the camp fire, telling ghost stories and playing truth-or-dare, etc.
There were also plenty of situations like the one you describe from your school camp story. To be fair, that sort of thing happens at LDS camps just like it happens in every other young teen social situation. And from my journal I can see all of the details of having played both roles at different times: excluder and excludee.
No one is born knowing how their behavior affects others. It’s something you learn from experiences such as the treatment you got from Patricia, Tanya, Tammy, Mary Ellen, Mary Beth, and VeLeah. They very possibly learned something from the experience as well and perhaps have even grown up to be nice people… 😉
To say something non-PC, though, it kind of jumps out at me to see the testimony meeting listed as one of the good parts. I remember that part as representing a huge amount of social pressure — from the leaders as well as the other girls — to feel a certain way, and it was not at all okay to stay seated instead of standing up and saying the expected things. I found it quite unpleasant, to put it mildly.
C.L., I rarely stood and shared my testimony at those testimony meetings around the campfire (way too shy) – I think I did once in all 7 years I went – so my wards/stakes must have been better than others at making it a voluntary thing (which is how it should be – there shouldn’t be pressure to just get up and say what everyone else is saying simply to do the act, and I do know others who’ve said what you’ve said, so it’s definitely an issue). I really loved the intensity of the Spirit there, though.
Does anyone have any good ideas for fundraisers for camp? I just got called as the camp director in a new, small, poor branch and we don’t have any supplies. We are going to have to buy all new supplies, along with food and all of the girls come from poor families. Also, it’s stake camp, so we can’t borrow from other wards because they will be using them at the same time we need to. Help!
Cristie, I looked at your blog and notice that you and your husband are a Cristie and Christopher. My sister is a Kristina (used to be “Kris” by many people, but now it’s too confusing so is “Kristina” by all) married to a Chris. I refer to them collectively as the Chrises (or Krises) or Kris and Chris (or is that Chris and Kris?). Hee!
Anyway… to actually answer your question, my ward has a few cattle ranches in it, and one of the ranches is run by people who are LDS, so they donate a cow and slaughter it and the YW sell the beef to raise money. I’m not sure that would work in many areas, but I throw it out there just in case. I remember doing a car wash when I was a Beehive to raise money for camp.
I am a new camp director, on the spiritual committee for camp. I would love any ideas (new) that will help the girls feel the spirit. I had a horrible experience at camp as a youth. My daughter is now attending her 2nd year, seem to like it. I would love a way to help them realize the powerful influence they have on each other, and how hurtful they can be, as well as how uplifting a kind word can be, or just noticing something. ANY IDEAS?
I don’t have any ideas for teaching them about the influence they have on each other, but I’ve got a couple other ideas.
An idea that I read on a blog and have passed on to my ward’s camp director is to use the stuff that you throw in a fire that changes the fire’s color (not sure what the stuff is called but it is either sticks or powder or rocks of chemical that a fireplace store would sell). Get the various colors that would cover the spectrum of the colors of the YW values. Put each one in a different envelope and give them to the girls. Write up some little story or scripture or thought on each value, and after each one is read, have the girl empty envelope into the fire.
One thing that my stake does that I really like is that they have 20 or 30 minutes or so each day where they girls take their scriptures and scatter into the woods for private study amongst nature.
I was just called to be Stake GIrls Camp Director and I am so excited, but I wanted to try and incorporate some of my years at girls camp with our stake. I have been to girls camp from the age of 12 to 20, I loved girls camp and I believe that was where I gained a greater part of my testimony.
Our Stake now has ALWAYS camped in their wards and I wanted to try and divide all of the girls in the stake and take them out of their wards. I felt like there was more unity in the stake that way. The wards are already strong and know each other so I feel that they need to get to know all of the girls in the other wards, since they will all go to the same high school and live in the same community. I wanted to try and incorporate that idea with our stake and they chose not to do it. Any ideas that I can use to unify all of the girls in the stake. They want to keep the girls with their wards for meals and sleeping arrangements, but throughout the day they can be with their other group. I’m thinking that it just might be more confusing for some of the girls, so I’m about to throw in towel and just keep them with their wards the whole time. Any ideas for me would be greatly appreciated.
Like your stake, my stake always camped with the girls separated by ward during stake camp years (we alternated years with ward camp and stake camp). Our interactions with the other wards were minimal – mostly just the big hike and a couple activities during the week. Had we been split up with girls from other stakes, I probably would have stopped going to camp. Not being a particularly social teenager, camp was the primary place for developing my closest ward friendships, and if I thought I’d be split away from my friends, the stress of such a thought would keep me way.
I realize that’s not what you are looking for, but I wanted to put that out there anyway as one perspective.
However, splitting up the wards during the day for various activities is something I, as a non-social teenager, would not have objected to (as long as I wasn’t the only one from my ward put with girls from other wards). I don’t think it would be confusing. Perhaps group all of girls by year for certain activities (like passing of the skills), or if that is too many, then split those year groups another time or two. Then they are interacting with a group outside just their ward.
I have been called as the assistant camp director for our ward. Being a convert and having a 12 year old daughter, I have never attended or been involved in girls camp before. I am SO excited and would like to hear ideas about what the girls liked and especially DIDN’T like.
We’re going to have minimal stake activities and stay within our own wards more. I’ve thought about this and I’m presonally glad we’re staying with our own wards because my daughter has friends in the other wards that she would probably want to hang out with, but I want her to get to know and love the girls in her ward more. I know I might feel differently if she was older.
As a YW leader I got to go to girl’s camp a couple years ago. Our stake had just been rearranged and our YW group was a hodge podge of girls from various wards put into a new one. Having a ward level girl’s camp a couple months after forming this new group was great for creating unity. Unity among YW even in a ward where the girls have known each other for years isn’t always easy to achieve.
I always loved girl’s camp when I was a girl. (My best friend and sister and I would have our bags packed weeks before.) One spiritual experience I will always remember was actually at a ward YW/YM river rafting camp out. They gathered us in the evening and told us we would be playing a game. They blindfolded us and told us to find a short list of items: a leaf, a rock, a twig and a blade of grass or something along those lines. We all started and by the time we were done finding them we had no idea where we were exactly or how to get back. The leaders started to softly play a tape of church hymns. Those who were smart enough to follow it made it back safely. They then went out in search of those who hadn’t thought to follow the music (yes- like me!) and help them get back. Once everyone was back, they had us remove our blindfolds and had a spiritual discussion about how this was like life and returning to live with Heavenly Father, needing to follow the spirit and needing to help others make it back too. It was a great object lesson. Lynette
Thanks for the fire idea! sounds cool! Interesting that our stake ALWAYS splits ours girls up by years, allowing them to have one preferred cabin buddy. We have girls the same age together then but from many different wards. The girls usually make connections from the whole stake then. I know this is better for some of the girls who really don’t have a great friend within thier individual ward. Sometimes girls can be really mean, and spliting up those who tend to think they are “better” than others, seems to help them not be so (for lack of a better word) evil! I love our young women and most of them are terrific, but some really need to learn to get along with others better! We do have a ward day, usually a hike and picnic and some activity, in which all of the bishopric are invited. Other than that it’s all the stake combined!
My Sarah hated girls camp because the girls were so mean to each other. She always came home crying. Then, the year she was a laurel, I came out of Relief Society to find her face covered with tears and she was irrational. The other girls look completely traumatized.
I just got her out to the car and she told me she had let it all out in YW telling the girls how mean they were and how awful she felt.
She ended up going that year and it was her best year and the girls from our ward won best camp for kindness (there was another word, but I can’t recall it). They learned from her.
One year she refused to go at all and I let her stay home. I never go places I don’t want to, why should she? It worked out.
I am looking for any locations for girls camp in Florida. Is there anyone out there that has any ideas? Our stake has about 200 at camp each year and we are located about half way down the state. I would really appreciate any suggestions. I would also like to set up a place where Stake Young Women leaders can communicate with other Stake Young Women Leaders. Anyone interested?
Jana, I can put you in touch with the high councilor responsible for young women’s work in Miami, where I live. He may have some ideas.
E-mail me at geoff@millennialstar.org.
Good luck!